Melissa Carolyn

...really, I'm not. <3
I'm just lazy and there hasn't been much excitment in my life. =P

Well, I did make some friends at college. Finally. The past year and a half of school has been spent going to class and being by myself. So it's definitely a welcome change to have people to hang out with. I'm slow at making friends. =P

I'll try keep up with the updates.

SaKi~~<3

Academics~~
~~One step closer to declaring my major
~~Got a 91 on my French midterm (still have to actually take the midterms for the other three)

Socialization~~
~~Actually hung out with people instead of sitting in my room doing nothing

Life~~
~~Taking it more seriously in some aspects, less seriously in others
~~Realized that being shy is slightly selfish ~~ trying to fix that

Ok, so I spent the couple hours before, and the walk to, French class fuming about it's insanity. I hated it. I hated all the work. I toiled over all those workbook pages and it was so time consuming and irritating. I wanted to leave and forget about school. I wanted to cry. I felt smothered. I wanted to break out of it and do something - to lash out at this suppression. I wanted to put on a bandana and shout 'arg!' I wanted to loot something. I wanted anarchy! xO

But, being the law abiding citizen I am, I went to class. And I was still miserable. For half the class period I was on the road to the Doldrums. I was ready to go back to my room and weep. Just wallow in my self-pity and loneliness.

But then, a miracle occurred. In the middle of class I realized I knew the answers! I wanted to answer questions! The homework paid off! I was happy again! Excited even. I thought, 'What was I thinking? I love French! Who knew doing your work would help you learn?! (insert huge 'DUH' here)'

And I was back in the saddle again.

(Told ja I'd live ;3 ~~~<3)

French homework can eat dirt.
This girl is tired of the overwhelming amount.
All work makes Mel a frustrated student.
rier hgptsioe hasre hgoiasehr g


I did enough. The rest will have to be handed in Tuesday. Thursday is finished as far as I'm concerned. I want to sleep and do nothing else.






Lemon Jello Kite Mongers~!!!! O_o


(Don't worry, I'll live. ~~~<3)

I want to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day. ~~~~<3

A note: Valentine's Day is a day for LOVE, not just for couples or for singles to whine or such. People should be appreciating the love they have, whether it be boyrfiend/girlfriend, friend, or family. So please, no complaining people. Thank you. <3

Yeah, I was supposed to do one of my 'Trilingual' posts yesterday. But not having laptop at school kinda makes it hard to get online. Plus, I have to wait til after French class at 9:30 at night to write anything. And last night was all cold and snowy. I just didn't feel like coming to the computer lab. I've also decided to only write 'Trilingual' posts when there'll be something meaningful in them, rather than just, 'oh we went over some other grammar stuffs is all.' So, I'll write when I feel like it. =P

On another note, I've decided to start the process of declaring a major. As a second year student, we have until the end of the school year to do it. But I'm thinking of studying abroad next year so I figure I should declare my major right away now that I've decided on it and get going on applying to study in England. I decided to major in Linguistics and I'm sort of aiming to study at the University of Sussex near London. Out of all the programs offered through Rutgers for studying abroad in England, I think Sussex is my best choice. And it being an hour train ride from London is a good part of it. Having been to London before and loving it so, I want to be as close as possible, but at the same time give myself a new environment to explore. Hopefully I can get the application process going sometime soon. This means I have to talk to my dean (about declaring my major), then someone in the Linguistics department about studying abroad, and maybe even a study abroad adviser to help me figure it all out. =P



Hope everyone has a Happy Valentine's Day tomorrow! ~~~~~~~~~<3

Trilingual Thursday~~~<3 (a.k.a. Trilingualese take two)


日本語: 今日、 私たちは「past tense short form」 をべんきょうしました。 あした、クイズがあります。 クラスは楽しいと思います。 私の先生が好きです。Ok, my brain stopped working. I can't think in Japanese right now 1) because it was so much earlier in the day; 2) I just came from French; 3) I'm using a school computer that doesn't have Japanese text (Edit ~ I stand corrected - I just tried changing the settings and it worked xP); 4) I'm tired - today was a long day. xP

Français: Aujourd'hui, nous avons étudié la negatives formes. (par exemple, ne...plus, ne...rien, ne...personne, etc) Puis, nous avons discuté <<Le Petite Nicolas et Les Copains>>. C'est une collection de mingonnes histoires de Nicolas et ses copains. Je l'aime bien. Enfin, nous avons vu un petit film de français. Maintenant, j'ai beacoup de devoirs.



ugh, running out of steam again. ~~~<3 I need sleep.



Bonsoir, おやすみなさい。~~~~~~~<33333

Happy Lunar New Year to everybody! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<3

*~flails~* I'm so happy! Today is such a beautiful day. It's warm enough not to need a coat and slightly overcast. It feels like Spring is just around the corner. It even smells like Spring - like I can literally smell the grass growing and coming alive again. Granted, there's also a hint of rain in there, but that's obviously because it's been drizzling on and off lately. But that just makes things even better! I love the smell of rain. And of Spring. So, of course, I'm extra happy. I just love when weather does that. It can actually make you want to go outside. I am so ready for Spring to be here. I'm tired of being cooped up in my dorm room all day and only coming out for classes, and the occasional meal. xP I actually had a fleeting notion to take advantage of Free Transit Week and slip out to New York City for the day. (FYI: Free Transit Week is when NJTransit trains and buses allow students with ID to ride for free up and down the northeastern coast. It's usually around the beginning of the semester) But I have work to do, so I'll have to enjoy the weather hear in New Brunswick instead. x3

Hope everyone else is having a great day! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<3

Bonsoir~~~<3

I've decided that my journal needs structure and so am going to post biweekly entries pertaining to the two language classes I'm taking this semester. I have Japanese and French every Tuesday and Thursday, so today will be a Trilingual Tuesday post. ~~~<3 I'll talk about what we did in class, if there is anything significant to discuss. Sometimes I'll write parts of the entries in each language. Maybe. Let me know what you think...


Japanese: Today, Balite Sensei was very encouraging when it came to how well we do in class. She said that she herself was not a great student in Japanese when she first started. She made just passing marks, so we shouldn't be discouraged when we do poorly. We just have to persevere. That's how she ended up becoming a teacher. Hooray for Balite Sensei. ~~~~<3333

French: French has been a little slow. It's an intermediate course and because it's not too far into the semester yet, we've basically been just reviewing. Hopefully, we'll start learning new information soon. <3





Not much to report tonight, so I guess I'll go get something to eat now. I'm hungry. >_<


TTFN~~~~~<33333

Ugh! I have so much French work to do. My professor decided to overload us. I have a 1-page composition due Tuesday. I have lab workbook pages to fill out, on top of regular workbook pages. I have to read a short story and answer questions about it by Thursday. And I have some weird internet thing as well. It's really not so bad when you think about it, but I have other work to do too, so it all may be a little bothersome. I actually started some of it, so I'm not really behind. I'm gonna go work on some more of it now.

Ta~

(In no particular order)

House
Bones
Psych
Monk
That 70's Show 
The Office
 Lost
How I Met Your Mother
NCIS
Criminal Minds
Boson Legal
30 Rock
Chuck
My Name is Earl
Scrubs
ER
Grey's Anatomy
Numb3rs

~~~~Can't think of anymore~~~~

I needed a change of venue. So I changed my layout. Nothing special. ^_^ 

I have a friend who is a hardcore student of Japanese, as in she talks about nothing but Japanese all the time. And I'm kind of getting sick of it. Yeah, I'm taking Japanese too and having someone to discuss it with is nice, but there's only so much time you can spend talking about one topic. I mean, life is full of other topics of discussion. And now she's started taking up Italian, which is giving me mixed feelings. I sort of wanted her to take French so I'd have someone to discuss French with, but she kind of dissed it when she was telling me about deciding on taking up a second (third if you count native English) language, not that she has no right to take up a different language, I'm all for it; I want to add more languages to my own list as well, but now I know she's going to be talking non-stop about Italian on top of the Japanese. Plus, she'll be telling me how her Japanese will give her a weird accent when she speaks Italian. It's just, I know I'm going to be bothered, but at the same time I feel wrong for being bothered. Maybe I'm just being annoyed over nothing. It's not like I have to talk to her (hear her talk) all the time. =P


On a more positive note, I'm enjoying all my classes this semester. I'm especially enjoying discovering the differences between Linguistics and Linguistic Anthropology as I am taking a class in both subjects. I wonder which I will like more, the scientific aspect or the social aspect of Language. ~~~<3

I wouldn't expect anyone to really notice, but I haven't posted in a while. Mainly because I've been lazy or nothing much has been going on. I'm getting by I guess. This is actually making me realize that my life could use some improving. I'm going to have to work on that this year. ^_^;;

    It was with much internal struggling that I finally came to the conclusion to put everything under a cut. I was debating between being evil and leaving a heaping of post-ness, or being nice and making a cut. The latter prevailed. My good conscience won. Then I thought about just putting certain parts under various cuts, but, in this instance, my laziness overruled the idea with a 'just dump it all under one cut and let everyone else figure it out.' Thus, the single cut was born:



=P
.

Earthquakes

Water Lilies

Fat Camp

Torn Asunder

Magazine Rack

Lazy-Boy Recliner

Smoke Gets in Your Eye

Leaves of Green

Seahorses

Lima Beans









★☆★☆★☆★☆

Nonsense

I know, It's been a while. Nothing much has been going on. Doing school work. Being lazy. Not doing my Nano. Yes, I haven't been writing it. It's Nov 21, and i have ~2200 words. But it is my first attempt. >_< (please don't hit me). I don't know what else to say. I really haven't been doing anything interesting.

hmm.....

oh, I know what's interesting. I had a friend stay over one weekend and on the first night she came over we were discussing how neither of us really interacts with guys, let alone guys interacting with us. After that conversation, all weekend we were approached by guys. Not necessarily in a flirty way, just talking to us. Like, when we were sitting in Starbuck's one guy started talking to us about kanji because he saw us typing in Japanese on our laptops. Another guy asked to borrow a cell phone to make a local call since he was from europe. There was also a random dude who started talking to us outside of the karaoke place we go to in the city. He said my friend looked like she was 100% swiss and I looked like a Filipino Korean. (She being of eastern european descent and I being chinese, irish, and german.) O_o The weirdest though would have to be the guy who decided to flirt with me through a window. We were at a pizza place in NYC and they had bar-type seating - like with stools at a long, high table - it was along the window, looking out onto the street. We were just sitting there eating our pizza when I noticed a guy stop in front of the window and look at me. He started making gestures reffering to my pizza as if asking if it was good, nodding his head. I was like, yeah it's good, nodding my own head and eating my pizza. But he was kinda being suggestive about it and even winked at me. I just continued with affirming that the pizza was good and I guess he was satisfied cause he went away. It was very odd and slightly scary. My friend was surprised at my calmness throughout. In my head though, I was begging him to move on.


Anyway, it's 430 in the a.m. and i have class in the morning, so i guess i should get some sleep.


Happy Thanksgiving.

My friend doesn't believe that a writer's characters can hijack the story and change it's course. I hope her attempt at NaNo this year proves her wrong.

1) Get woken up by the alarm clock at 7:30am and snooze it til 9am. At said time, roll out of bed and get ready for class. At 9:30am head for class. 9:50am, French.

2) French: Review the passé composé, the present tense, and the future proche. Start going over the imparfait, yet another past tense.

3) After class ends at 11:10am, head to the dining hall for a late breakfast. Mmm, scrambled eggs and bacon. And tater tots.

4) Go back to dorm room and fart around for an hour. Think about working on your novel for NaNo, but don't actually do it.

5) At 12:40pm head to next class. 1:10pm, Japanese.

6) Japanese: Oh goody, a chapter test. Breeze through test and realize afterwards that you definitely got two questions wrong but assure yourself that everything else is correct. Because it is. Sit around while the most of the rest of the class takes the whole period to finish. Leave class at 2:30pm.

7) Walk over to Starbuck's and stay there for three hours. During said hours a) talk to friend on phone who can't seem to stop talking, b) drink coffee, c) watch freaky homeless man harass customer at next table, twice, d) read ahead in Japanese text and learn the next chapter, adjectives e) leave before it gets dark.

8) 6pm, check emails and such. sit around reading random posts. 7:30pm, call mom. <3

9) 8pm - My Name is Earl; 9pm - The Office, 9:30pm - Scrubs, 10pm - ER.

10) Decide not to grab late-night dining hall take-out because a) too lazy, b) you got snacks, c) you're not really hungry d) you can eat tomorrow.

11) Think about NaNo-ing some more but still not do it. Post a journal entry.

12) Maybe stay up NaNo-ing despite having an 8:10am class tomorrow.


~savvy

I have always enjoyed the many characters of Johnny Depp. But, every time, it was always easy to move on to the next character. It may be because there was more than one Pirates movie, but after the last one, I had forgotten that life goes on. I forgot that Johnny Depp would be moving on to new characters. The end of Jack Sparrow felt like the end of Johnny Depp. I didn't even know I thought this way until I saw the trailer for Sweeney Todd. I always knew it was coming, but to actually see proof, that was when it all sunk in. When I finally realized this, I also realized that it would mean the potential for even bigger and better things, better roles, better movies, better characters. I don't know how great Sweeney Todd will be (hopefully very) but I know that I will at least be happy to see Johnny Depp once more on the big screen.

<333

A couple things I feel like mentioning, all of which have made me happy. ^__^

1) I wrote a letter to my friend in Japanese. She's a year ahead of me. She showed my letter to her teacher yesterday and her teacher told her that it was very good. ^_^

2) I got my Japanese midterm back yesterday and I got a 98%. There was only one grade higher, a 99.6%. Yay me. ^_^

3) I picked up a copy of the campus newspaper and there was a mini movie poster for Sweeny Todd with Johnny Depp on it. XDDD I can't wait til Christmas. <33 Of course, I had to take a couple extra copies. x3

4) It's Halloween! I may not have any reason to dress up, but today does allow one to wear extra orange, which is my favorite color. X3

5) NaNoWriMo starts tonight at midnight!!! I'm so excited. Especially because I have no clue what will come out during those first few seconds that I start writing. I'm kind of anxious to see what I write. xP




I can't think of any more reasons for being happy. I guess I'm just at the top of a wave today (to reference my wave metaphor from my previous entry). ^_^



HAPPY HALLOWEEN! <3333

I think I'm coming out of my low. Today went pretty well. I had both French and Japanese, which always makes me feel good, as Thursdays are the only days that I have both at once. Things got even better when I decided to stop at Starbuck's. For anyone who doesn't know, Starbuck's is where I usually hang out with my friend back home, so sitting at one is comforting enough. While I was there I wrote my friend a letter in Japanese and rewrote it in French. That made me feel even better. Then I went shoe shopping. I bought myself a new pair of boots for the winter. Who knew shopping could make you feel better. I guess I'm more of a girl than I thought. xP

So, all in all, today was a good day.

Living here on campus I've realized that college life is like a wave. There are high points where you think living alone is the best thing to happen to you. Then there are lows where being alone feels so lonely. Right now, I'm in a low. I feel so disconnected from everyone and everything seems tedious and boring. And when I'm feeling lonely I tend to be more susceptible to emotional events and more likely to succumb to tears. I watched a commercial last night and started crying. It could be just that I don't really have anyone around here who I can hang out with, but either way it isn't fun. And being shy doesn't help either. *sigh* Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

I recruited my friend to write a novel for National Novel Writing Month. She's gonna come visit me in a few weeks and we'll spend that weekend at Starbuck's writing our novels. I can't wait. <3

"My hand is messed up!"

It hurts. T_T I have horrible posture when it comes to typing. I should probably fix that. My wrist is protesting. xP


I should also fix the fact that my tummy is protesting its emptiness. I'm too lazy to walk over to the student center for food. I have to cross two streets. How lame am I?

j'ai faim... >_<

I was reading the news and it said that piracy worldwide is on the rise. I wonder if it's time for piracy to step back into the spotlight. °_° 

I took my Japanese midterm today and I think I pretty much aced it. ^__^  yay me. xP

I think I like having a public journal better than a private one. I feel like I'm free to do and write whatever I want in my public journal, whereas my private one is just catering to the friends I already have there. Not that I don't love writing and commenting for them. <333

Last night I watched a spider die of Windex overdose. Now I have a spider corpse sitting on my windowsill. Think I should get rid of it?



Over the weekend I went to the movies and saw 'The Heartbreak Kid.' Anyone who is not a Ben Stiller fan, don't go see it.

Before the movie there are of course trailers for future movies. So, I now know what I want to do for Christmas. To go to the movies. And see Tim Burton's 'Sweeny Todd, The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.'  What a great way to spend such a warm holiday. xP I'm a fan of Burton and a big fan of Johnny Depp. And the movie looks good. Plus I want to hear Johnny Depp sing. It's been a while since he really has. <3



ttfn

Some things on my mind.

I was just looking at a website with cute Japanese style clothing. Everything is sooo cute! X3 I want to wear it all, but I don't think I can pull off cute girlyness very well. I'm a girl at heart, but I don't act like it. I think I repress my girlish tendencies. I like clothes and shoes and putting my hair up, but I hardly ever go shopping and usually stick to jeans, t-shirts and sneakers. xP I think have hard time being openly girly because my mom's not too girly - she doesn't wear makeup or earrings or womanly clothes unless she's going to a big to-do - and I don't have any other girly influences at home, just my dad and brother, who are far from being girly. So, I've no reason to express my girlyness. xP

This weekend was so tiring for me. I haven't walked so much in my life. I went to visit a friend at school in Staten Island and we hung out in New York City. On Saturday I walked forty city blocks for no reason. We could have tried the subway but we didn't. I don't know what we were thinking. Then on Sunday I went with her to a charity walk for autism. And it didn't help that I didn't get much sleep in between because her dorm room is soooo cold. >_< I kept waking up and hardly slept. So of course I need to catch up on my sleep, and where do I do it? During class today. xP I just couldn't stay awake. It's a good thing it was during anthropology, one of those big lecture hall classes where the professor just drones on and there's hundreds of students, so sleeping students don't exactly get noticed. Plus the lecture slides are online so I don't really have to worry about what I missed. But after that class I really needed a pick-me-up so I went to Starbuck's for a venti pumpkin spice latte. I sat there and caught up with the readings for anthropology, which had to be sad readings about death that made me cry. In the middle of a Starbuck's. I hope no one noticed. xP

While visiting my friend this weekend we went out to dinner with some of her friends at her school. They were so girly, talking about dating guys and flirting with the waiter. The whole time I just thought, 'how the hell do you do that?' How the hell do you just start chatting up a random guy and end up going out with him? I'm shy. I can't do that. I've never come close to dating. I'm such an introvert. >_< But whatevs. I figure dating will come to me when it comes.

I was watching an episode of the anime, 'Honey & Clover' the other day and there was a scene that made me think of my own experiences. One of the characters was commenting on a little girl. He said that when she'd say 'I love my brother and we will always be together,' the rest of the family would look on with smiling, knowing faces, thinking that 'it's a wish that will melt like snow.' It's like one of those instances where the kid says something that the adults know is kid stuff and they make that knowing face. It got me thinking about myself and voicing those kinds of thoughts as a kid. I think as a kid I could recognize that face and it kind of turned me off to voicing my thoughts on what I want. I still don't say what I want. If you ask me I'll be like, 'eh, I don't know, maybe...' even if I know what I want and I really want it. It's even gone so far as made me able to be indifferent to what I get. I'll think, 'I want this, but I if i don't get it I'll still live, so it doesn't matter.' This is not a good thought. Cause, when applied to life, I'm going to wind up with a whole lot of nothing. I gotta start doing things.

Which is what I was thinking about earlier today when I was in Starbuck's. I'm always doing the same thing everyday, going to class, stopping at the dinging hall to eat, and staying in my room the rest of the time. I need to break out of this rut of a routine. And Starbuck's was a break, which is why I started thinking this way. I need to start doing things I don't normally do. I need to go out and meet people. I don't have any friends on campus. This is my second year of college. Find some friends already, you ninny! xP I'm going to try to do something i don't normally do at least twice a week. It'll be good for me.

Well, I think that's enough rambling for one entry. ttfn, ta ta for now. <3

luv savvy <3

Hey alls. I'll be visiting my friend at her college so I probably won't be checking my journal til Sunday night at the earliest. Not that it'll matter much considering I don't have that many friends here to begin with. But hopefully that won't be the case forever. Must overcome shyness!! XP

Luvs yous alls.

Savvy <33

Why? Because I have classes from 9:50am til 11pm. Well, the last bit's an exam, but school work none the same. ^_^ First I have French class where we'll be taking the aural part of our midterm. Hopefully my listening skills are on par. xP Then I have Anthropology in the afternoon. The hard part is going to be getting to recitation afterwards because I have an hour to get from Douglass campus back to College Ave and of course there are plenty of other people who need to do the same. Then, in the evening I have a French midterm which is supposed to last from 930 til 11. I don't know why they make these things so late, but the good news? No French class the following morning. XD I get to sleep in on a weekday! Yay!!! X3 But in a way, I'm kind of sad that I won't be having French class because Thursdays are the only days that I have two language classes in one day. I would have had French in the morning and Japanese in the afternoon. The rest of the week I have them on separate days. Oh well, I'll just spend Thursday focusing on Japanese since I'll be focusing on French extra hard tomorrow. ^___^


<333

Now, I'm a pretty big Johnny Depp fan, but I've never seen the show '21 Jump Street,' his claim to fame. I just watched the first episode today and I must say it made me laugh. X3 It's so cheesy, but I love it. XD Hilarious. It's also weird watching him from so long ago. ^__^ I feel like I just want to get in there and tell him he's gonna be a big star one day. xP

Jaa, just thought I'd share. Laterz <333

Ugh, I'm so unmotivated when it comes to school work. I am excellent at procrastination and wasting time, but I just don't have any way of getting myself to get my work done at a decent time. I'm always doing a half-assed job at the last minute. I don't read every chapter or print out every slide shown during lectures. I hardly study. Studying was never something I understood. I just don't know how to do it. I don't have the discipline to make myself flash cards or study sheets. I skim over my notes and the text and I'm done studying. I usually do it the night before or just before the test. Maybe I need to be taught how to study? 0_o I took a test the other day in Child Development Psychology and I got an 81%. I can only think that it was well deserved because anything higher would be shocking, considering I can't study. I didn't really read every chapter in the text and I'm usually half asleep during lectures. I really don't know how to study. And I'm too lazy to work it out. FYI, I am definitely lazy and I procrastinate. Does anyone know how to fix that, or is it one of those things you have to do yourself?

Anyway, on another note, I am also horribly bad at initiating human contact. I can't start conversations. I can respond to other people starting things, but I'm just so shy and have little confidence in myself. I think it's really that I'm afraid of risking rejection. Maybe that's why I've never had a boyfriend before, let alone ever even been on a date. Yes, it's sad, I know. But I'm not crying about it. Except it must bother me in some way if I'm writing about it, ne? I guess I just want human contact, to be liked, for someone to be interested in me. My friends don't really show much interest in me. They'll ask questions but not many. And I'm not one to tell them what they don't want to know. I'm not one to dump my woes on other people. I hide all that. ^_^ I guess anonymous public journals are an exception. xP But when people do start talking to me, inside, I'm really happy and grateful. I'm used to being on the outside looking in, watching the interactions. And I enjoy it, but that only gives you so much. People need interaction. This year, I've been slowly getting better, I think. I have plenty of fun talking to people in my French and Japanese class. Just earlier today a kid in my Japanese class acknowledged my existence saying that he sees me everywhere, as we also have a giant lecture hall class together.

I don't know. I'm just one of those people who obliges everyone else. I let you talk about what you want for however long you talk and, while it makes me perfectly happy, I still feel left out. And I don't blame you, I blame myself. I just get so frustrated with myself sometimes. >_<


Argh. Fix yourself you fool! xP

<333333333

Well, here's my first post for all the world to see. And what is the topic? The study worksheet I forgot to do and is due tomorrow. ^_^;;; Yeah, I totally forgot about it when I was busy realizing that I needed an anonymous public journal to actually be myself. At least it's not a whole essay, ne? Anyway, I think this journal is going to be life altering for me, at least, I hope it will. It's just that it's kind of hard to write from every part of you when the friends who will read your posts only know you as a certain way. Not that my friends wouldn't understand, it's just easier to write when people close to you aren't going to read what you wrote. I've been a certain way for so long and never really took the time for self discovery. And it's easier if I do it away from everyone I know. I'm not used to being myself, completely myself, around others. I get shy and hold my tongue. If I want to stop and do something not routine I'm too afraid to do it. Why? O_o The closest I've been to being myself is with myself, and I still don't really feel like myself. Ok, now I'm rambling and repeating myself. If I do that, ignore it. I have a tendency to do so. Hopefully I will eventually get over it, and by 'get over it' i mean figure out my feelings because that's really where the problem comes from. Since I don't know my own feelings I have to repeat myself to understand what I'm trying to say. If that makes any sense. ^^; Hmm, this is a rather revealing entry for a first post. I guess what I'm trying to say is that with this journal I hope to find who I am and gain more confidence in myself. So I'd appreciate any kind hearts and kind words. I'll take harsh ones too I suppose, when i need them. xP

<333333333

Hihi! Welcome to my journal. ^___^ This is a public journal, so feel free to take a sample before friending me. If you want. <333